Funny Messages for Boyfriend and Girlfriend: Quotes for Him and Her

Funny Messages for Boyfriend and Girlfriend: All relationships need a bit of humor. Funny quotes and annoying messages can put a smile on the face. The key is to be original. Don’t be a loser and rip a humorous quote off Google. Think about something that is unique to your relationship and give it an epic twist. Here are a few crazy ideas to get you started. Some of them are nasty and hit below the belt, so don’t forget to follow you funny jibes with lots of hugs, kisses and presents!

 

Funny Messages for Girlfriend: Quotes for Her

1) My love for you is like a fart that can’t be contained. Bursting out aloud in all its glory and fragrance.

 

2) I know why you work out every day. You want to look as hot as me, don’t you?

 

3) If you feel like getting a hug from me, just close your eyes and imagine I’m there. If you feel like giving me a kiss, just close your eyes and I WILL BE THERE.

 

4) I’m so happy for you, that you’ve got the most good-looking boyfriend ever.

 

5) I love it when we kiss. Because you can’t kiss and talk at the same time.

6) I feel for you and totally understand if you get jealous all the time. I’d feel the same way if I had such a hot boyfriend.

 

7) Last night I was missing you so much, that I hugged my pillow and went to sleep. It was almost the same as cuddling with you except better, coz the pillow didn’t say a word the whole time.

 

8) Hey I’m not jealous. I just think you’re too hot for other guys to be talking to. The last thing I’d want is for them to feel bad about being turned down.

 

9) I believe in gender equality. So on our next date, I’m going to split the bill with you.

 

10) Did you know that kissing burns calories? Want to work out?

11) My love for you is like pooping. I’d be dead without it.

 

12) Did you know that men and women poop differently? Yes, according to science, it’s easier for men to poop than women. I feel for you babe.

 

13) In your wildest dreams, did you ever, ever imagine you’d have a boyfriend as hot as me? Aren’t you lucky! Just sayin.

 

14) You’re like my old car. It used to drive me crazy. I Love You!

 

15) I have to say babe, your choices are the best! You chose me, didn’t you?

 

Funny Messages for Boyfriend: Quotes for Him

1) Never, ever forget that an angry girlfriend is a car without gas. You’ll keep paying the loan payments and it’ll take up space in your garage, but it ain’t going nowhere.

 

2) Our relationship is based on two simple rules. Number one, you do everything I say. Number two, never forget number one.

 

3) When it comes to our relationship, I want you to be stress-free all the time. Just keep calm and do as I say.

 

4) Whenever we’re fighting, always remember that every minute spent arguing could’ve been spent cuddling.

 

5) You are every girl’s dream come true. But never ever take that for granted, else I’ll be your worst nightmare.

6) You can disagree with me all you want, because at the end of the day, we’re two individuals. I cannot force you to be right.

 

7) Our relationship will always be a two-way street as long as both ways are peppered with gifts for me.

 

8) Chocolates first, kisses second.

 

9) I know sometimes I can be a demanding girlfriend. But that’s why you’ve got 24 hours a day to hustle.

 

10) Our relationship is simple. You do what I say, and I say what you have to do.

11) Sometimes I wish you were as generous with your wallet as God has been generous with your looks.

 

12) Our relationship is based on one simple ground rule. You break my heart, I break your jaw.

 

13) I promise, I’ll never ever ask you to give me money. Except, when I go shopping.

 

14) I promise I’ll never be a high maintenance girlfriend as long as you promise never to be a dud of a boyfriend.

 

15) Our relationship is a two-way street. As long as both ways lead to me.